by Kit Nemenzo Balane
If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it (Matthew 10:39).
This verse in the Bible is so much alive in my therapy room. Most, if not all, who come to me for therapy are confused, in disarray, depressed, anxious, hopeless, and so on. And their condition is so much influenced by getting so concerned about life and themselves.
When we cling to dear life, our stance will always be on the survival and pleasure mode. It will always be self-preservation and promotion. Our interaction with others will be more of seeking what we can get rather than what we can give.
But the more we get, the more we want. Why? Because there is no satisfaction to the self. Always and always, it will seek for more. There is no satiation. There will always be a need to be filled and a want to be satisfied.
The process of getting requires a struggle. It is in the struggle that we lose ourselves and create our problems. We get anxious and troubled while we still don’t have it. Then if we don’t get what we want, we get frustrated, and then angry. When we have it and lose it, we become dismayed and depressed. On and on, the vicious cycle continues.
But what if you give up the struggle and offer your life beyond yourself? What if you share? What if you give? What if you serve truly? Enigmatically, you will find yourself.
How? By losing it.By giving it.When you let it go.And more specifically, when you dedicate it to something greater than the self…greater than you are. You realize in the process that your real self is part and parcel of a universal self. And that what happens to you is part of a grand plan.
If you turn your attention on how you can serve others, you will forget about your very own concerns. Depression, for instance, can be healed through acts of altruism. Because at the very least, depression is an illness that is characterized by ruminating on a thought discriminating the self.
But if you look at others’ concerns, you begin to see and feel that you are not alone. This sense of universalization is a potent element in healing someone who is depressed. And in the process of serving, you will also see that others may have bigger and more pressing issues than you have.
And then you find meaning. And you realize that life is not about yourself. That there is something greater than the self. And that the life you actually believed to be what it is, that is only focused on the self, is not real until it is given away.
Look at Jesus’ life. His only concern was how to fulfill a mission that is greater than himself. His focus was on something grand and meaningful. Hence, he did not mind much the needs for the self, because he was so consumed with his mission of saving and loving. And so he found himself along the way.
Can we trust him when He says “give your life to me and you will find it?†Such is an audacious invitation. But Jesus’ must know what he is talking about. After all, he proved it by His resurrection.
His Resurrection clearly shows that there is more to life than the one we live now. And it is our choice to get stuck on our own worldly cares and lose our self, or look to Jesus and follow his ways and find meaning to our existence. And understand that our real self is never real until it is resurrected.
I don’t know with you. But like others, I have made my decision. Finding myself is not much of a care anymore. Because in Jesus, I see myself. What else will I seek for? Happy Easter!
P.S. The best way to prepare your preschool kids for schooling this June is to engage them during the summer. Come and enrol now at Bohol Child Head Start. Summer classes for Therapeutic and Creative Play (Ages 1.8 to 4 years old) will start on April 13, 2015. For your inquiries, please call or text 416-1248/09295571136.